Think I Know Why I Am Feeling a Little Funky

I have been feeling a little funky the last couple of days and so I have been taking it easy.  This afternoon I went and laid down to take a nap and woke up with tears streaming down my face ~ I woke from a dream about my Dad.  And then I remembered...

10 years ago today he passed away.  I have been told I have a gift of being able to remember dates and events but sometimes I think it can be a curse.  I remember the morning I heard so vividly.  I had been at work about 15 minutes when I got a call from Ron asking if I had any meetings or anything this morning.  I told him no, he said well don't go run any errands.  He would be there in a few.  Now I am thinking why would I go run errands at 8:00 in the morning.  And then my mind started racing...what is wrong?  what happened to the boys?  did something happen to his Mom?  my Mom?    I didn't have to wait long.

Ron walked into my office and shut the door.  And then he told me my sister, Kathy, had called him and told him my Dad had died that morning.  I stood there and in walked Charles U. and Darlene E. (later I found out I had let out a blood curdling scream) and Ron was hugging me and I was crying.  Ron told them what happened.  Charles told me I could go home.  I just sat there dazed not knowing what to do.  After about 10 minutes I said I would go home after I got all the paychecks organized and distributed ~ it was pay day and I couldn't let the employees not get paid.  And straighten a few things in the office. 

I also called Kathy and told her I would call her back in a couple of hours to see what was going to happen ~ you know arrangements and stuff.

I worked till about 10:30 telling Charles I would call him to let him know what was going on and then drove home.  I remember crying and praying and wondering what was I supposed to do.  After arriving home Ron and I talked then called Kathy back.  There would be no service but if I wanted to come and see him I could.  We were in WA state and they were in Sacramento, CA.  So phone calls were made along with arrangements to have Brandon fly from Idaho to CA and for Ron, Jamie and I to drive down.  We left Ferndale about noonish and arrived at my sister's in Sacramento at 6:00 the next morning.

I wish I could say the next few days were a blur but they are clearly etched in my mind ~ seeing my dad with his stomach bloated and extended.  And replaying something he said many years prior to me "that he would always have us girls but not his friends."  (That is another post ~ it had to do with the accident where I lost my eye and the following lawsuit.)  And that is who was there ~ us three girls, George, Kathy's husband, her daughter Christi and Ron and our boys.  After seeing my Dad at the mortuary we drove over and saw my Mom.  Even though they had been divorced and remarried a couple of times each, Mom was dealing with her own grief and sadness related to my Dad.  We stayed in CA for a few days and then made our way home. 

Saying good-bye to my Dad was bittersweet.  We were saying good-bye to him and yet we had done that five years prior when he had tried to commit suicide in summer of 1995.  After that he was moved to a locked care facility.  He didn't always know who his kids were or how long time had passed.  Sometimes he knew us and other times we met him in the moment of where he was.  In his last 10 years of life he dealt with Parkinson's Disease and Dementia due to alcoholism.  The last few years of his life we enjoyed short fun visits with him ~ bringing him chocolate or strawberry milkshakes and sending him small packages of M&M's and at Christmas time sending him Aplets & Cotlets from Liberty Orchards...he found those candies on one of his trips to our home in WA.  To this day we buy little packages of Aplets & Cotlets and put them in the kids and grands Christmas stocking's as a way of remembering my Dad.

All these thoughts have been running through my head since I woke up from my nap.  Also probably why I am missing Jamie & Suzanne & Opal and Brandon & Danalyn, Max, Christopher & Treyson...missing my family and being reminded that family is the most important thing we have.  So hug your kids and grands extra hard today and let those close to you know how much they mean to you.

Love and miss you Dad!!!

Thinking about the tomorrow's in our life.

As we were heading home today from a weekend with blogger I asked Ron what one thing would he like to do before he dies...and he said go to Alaska by driving there and then working up there for a summer season.  So we had a long conversation and have come to the conclusion to do that we would definitely need a different rig and to do that we definitely need to refine our budget to build our savings up and think how we can do this. So keep us in your prayers as we work through all this thinking and planning.

Sunday Evening 10/9/11

We are home now...sounds funny since our home always travels with us :)  We had a good time with Cindy & Walker Brewer.  And the rain last night and today was refreshing even with the leak around the window.

And of course no trip with The Wandering Workentins is ever uneventful.  Hubby pulled into the HEB in Hondo to get gas before we returned to the Lone Star Corral.  While waiting for a pump to empty I decided to go into HEB and get some bananas for smoothies in the morning.  Just as I started to step out of the motor home there was a huge bang and jolt and I said SH...!  And quickly stepped out of the rig to see a lady in a pickup towing a horse trailer hooked onto our motor home.  Yes, we had been hit.  Ron told her to back up a little and let's see what the damage was.  Fortunately she only pulled the metal and rubber end off the rig!!  And Ron put it all back together.  Not her trailer though - she had to take a hammer to get it pulled away from the tire. 

As we were driving home (before the little incident at HEB) we were talking about maybe looking for a new motor home to purchase as we continue to plan for where we go after we are done in Texas...on Ron's bucket list is to drive to Alaska and work up there for a summer...so the wheels are turning....and then after the incident we both commented if the gal had ripped off the back end of the motor home it would have been totaled...hmm can we go back and have her hit us a little harder :)  just kidding we really are glad the damage was little and no one was hurt.

Now to start thinking/planning/figuring for the future!.

On a sad note, we got word this morning that Ed, the previous Assistant Manager died of a massive heart attack late last night...please keep Jeannette and their kids in your prayers.

6 AM on Sunday, October 9, 2011

Got woken up at 4:21 a.m. due to the door slamming shut from the wind.  Laid in bed and watched the lightening, listening to the thunder and then hearing a drip, drip, drip on the bedroom window.  We haven't had much rain here in drought stricken Texas but this morning is different.  It is coming down and hard at that.  Just checked radar and there are flash flood warnings in Bexar and Guadalupe County (where we currently are visiting friends).  I do love the sound of the rain though (can you believe this Washington transplant girl is saying that?)

Anyway, thought I would just check in and let y'all know we are fine.  Hope to be able to update more tonight once we are back in D'Hanis.  Have a great day today!!